Both Sides By Rev. Nina D. Grey February, 2002

Reflections on unity and community...

We held our Unity Party, January 19, and folks brought good comfort food and we talked and some of us danced and others enjoyed the music or the conversation. The dancing included folk and circle dances and some couples and group dancing, with music from several traditions. There were people of differing ages, cultures, and sexual orientations. There were long time members and newcomers. It was such fun to watch the very little ones dancing and playing in our midst. The young people made our name tags and other creative objects. I think this was one very successful and joyful multigenerational event in our congregation's life! It was a real honoring of our commitment to unity in a diverse and beloved community.

The next day we remembered Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., in our annual birthday commemoration of his legacy. The reading was his words about our interdependence. He wrote, "We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. ... Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." We thought about the call of commitment to a multicultural church and a pluralistic society in a world which challenges such a vision. We remembered the importance of welcoming all the varied voices to the tables of participation and decision-making.

Ethicist, psychologist, and religious philosopher Scott Peck emphasized the difficulty of creating authentic community in the face of genuine differences. We come to the tables of life and community with different lenses, affected by race and culture, age and experience, gender and sexual orientation, and so many other dimensions of being human.

While there are great blessings, richness and a multitude of gifts when all the voices are cherished, there is also the possibility of disagreement and dissonance. It is not always easy to find common ground and mutuality of understanding. Scott Peck said that in creating community we move through an apparent harmony and then can go deeper and discover honest differences. When we listen with openness and speak with honesty, we can also discover resonances with each other's experiences and move to a new level of community. In the thought of Unitarian theologian, the late Henry Wieman, when we make room for all the voices, there is creative interchange and a new deeper or higher harmony.

In this time of our nation's life, since September 11, 2001, and in the midst of war, we hear the language of unity, unity of purpose and commitment to what holds us together as a nation. But the language of unity hides differences of experience and understanding. And some government actions have made it more difficult for some members of our society honestly to express their concerns and different views without fear.

But we cannot foster a true unity unless it is based on our most foundational constitutional commitment to freedom of ideas and the possibility of hearing and speaking profound differences of views in an atmosphere of respect. Unity is coerced and false when it is based on suppression of thought and expression. And true community cannot evolve if some of the community's members cannot bring their whole selves, including their differences, to the table.

On Monday, January 20, at the Rockefeller Chapel celebration of Dr. King's life and work, the keynote speaker, State Senator Barak Obama, spoke of three principles which were very important to Dr. King's vision.

One was empathy. This is what is required if we are to listen openly and speak honestly. We have to be willing to imagine what it would be like to be in the shoes of the other.

The second was personal responsibility. If we wish to resist the curtailment of the civil liberties which are so dear to us, and foster a full discourse on the most important topics of our times, we each need to take personal responsibility, to be aware, to nurture our own courage, to speak our own truths.

The third was hope. Hope, Mr. Obama said, is created in the face of hardship and trial. He meant that even though the spirit of freedom is more at risk, even though justice is still a distant dream, even though peace seems far away, still we will hope. Still we will believe in the possibility of progress. Still we will work for change.

I believe that an unwavering commitment to express the fullness and richness of our diversity can only strengthen the possibility of unity in the days and world to come. May we live that commitment with courage and what Dr. King called, "the strength to love."

In faith, with love,

Nina